Official Fanfiction University of Crossovers
by XNemesis
Summary: The OFUC...a place where fangirls scream, minis laugh, and much is yet to be learned. Will bad!crossovers forever plague fanfiction? A Miss Cam authorzed OFU
1. In the beginning

Disclaimer: I, Autumn, do not own any fandom that is seen at any point in this fanfic. They all belong to their particular creator. Furthermore, I do not own the idea for this fanfic. That belongs to Camilla Sandman (AKA: Miss Cam), the writer of the Official Fanfiction University of Middle Earth. She also owns Mini Balrogs (with the exception of my own, the valaer). The owner of Mini Aragogs is Meir Brin (writer of the Hogwarts Fanfiction Academy). The Realm O' Crossovers, however, belongs to me. As does my brainchild and fanwriter, Carrie Herman (if a real person exists with this name, this is not them). And so does the mysterious Lord of Crossovers (AKA: the headmaster of OFUC). More disclaimers will appear throughout this fanfiction.

If you wish to enrol, go to my blog at: www . journals . aol . com / autumn19707 / xnemesis. Copy and paste into the url bar, and remove the spaces.

In the beginning...

* * *

Somewhere deep within the heart of the United States of America, there lived a girl. She sat in her room at her computer. She opened AOL, and signed on. A ridiculously annoying voice announced, "Welcome! You've got mail!" 

She opened her inbox with some trepidation, and looked at the subject line. "Yes! More reviews!" the female homo sapien squealed. "I knew that those losers were wrong about my ficcie! Who wouldn't love the gorgeous daughter of Remie-poo and Galadriel?!" She clicked on the review and read it. Its contents were devastating to the fangirl's oversized ego. "What a loser! I can't believe that so many people don't know good fanfiction when they see it!"

The next review, however, was not so bad. It read:

_Wowowow!!11! DiS fIccIe Iz So0o0o WoUnDrFlL!!11!!u hev 2writ moremoremore!!11!!111i cant wate 2c hoo Celothiwen choozeZ!!1!!11i wood chooz Leggie-poo tho... PLZ UPD8 SOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!!!!111!1!!!!11!11_

Carrie beamed. This was exactly the inspiration she needed. She closed AOL, and opened Word. Her fingers clacked on the keyboard as she typed out the last chapter of her story. 'This is going to be an awesome ending. It is like so going to rock!'

She was about a quarter of the way done when a long hairy _something_ smacked her hand away from the keyboard. She turned around and screamed at the sight of a four-foot-tall spider and a flaming, demonic, winged thing. "Mom! Dad! Mike! Where are you?!" But, of course, as fate would have it, none of them were home so no one answered her desperate cries.

"Silly fangirlses, there is no oneses heres to hearses youses," the spider admonished her. She screamed again.

"Please stop screaming. It hurts our ears. Just fill outs the form," the demon sighed. It handed her a slightly charred package of papers. She opened them curiously and a form fell onto her floor, along with other things. She grabbed a pen and started to fill out the form.

"What's my name? Carrie Herman... Age? 16... Species? What the hell? Well, if they must ask, then I'll be an um...nymph! Luxury item? My laptop and my Harry Potter DVDs of course... What fandoms do I write for? Um Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings... How well do I know the canon? What's canon? Were the fandoms made into movies? Yes... Did I like the movies better? I never even read the books. What a waste of time when I could just as easily turn on my DVD player." It went on like this for a while. One might wonder why this, quite obviously, somewhat unstable person would ever be allowed near a computer, but alas, we have no control over it. Until now at least...

"Okay, I'm done!" she said tiredly, one hour later. She handed the form back to the fiery demon, ignoring the warning at the bottom that stated:

_Let us say that you and all of your fellow fanwriters are mosquitoes (rather annoying ones at that). Any damage that may happen to mosquitoes is the mosquitoes' own fault. If a mosquito accidentally gets trod upon, it is not OFUC's fault. I agree to not sue OFUC for any reason._

The demon took it from her moodily, and flew up to her shoulder. It grabbed her by the end of her poorly bleached hair, and lifted her up. She screamed in pain and struggled, "What are you doing to me?! Help me!" The spider jumped on the demon's back, wrapping its silky web around her neck. They cackled evilly, and the demon flew away.

Away, away, away they flew, through the darkness, and into the storm. They reached a black castle in the middle of a strange land. It wasn't particularly frightening, just odd. It seemed to be unable to make up its mind as to what it looked like. This was the Realm O' Crossovers.

"Put me down you stupid...things!" Carrie shrieked in fury.

"Whatever youses says silly fangirlses," the spider shrugged and they released her. She fell. And she fell. And she fell. And she fell some more. It occurred to her that maybe she should have waited until after she had reached the ground, but it was too late for that now. She saw a man and a black cloaked, scythe bearing something standing on the ground, watching her fall. She yelled for help, but they did not seem to hear. And then, she went splat.

"I do believe that this proves that when one falls from the sky, they do indeed go splat," the first said as he looked amusedly at the splatted fangirl. "I wonder how Mary Sues manage it..."

"PERHAPS, THEY ARE MADE OF AIR?" Death suggested.

* * *

Please review, and if anyone wishes to beta this, they may. My old beta is not my beta anymore.


	2. Many Minis and Fighting Fangirls

Disclaimer: I, Autumn, do not own any fandom (so far: Lord of the Rings, the Silmarillion, Harry Potter, Discworld, Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon, Inuyasha, the Matrix, and Star Trek Voyager) that is seen at any point in this fanfic. They all belong to their particular creator. Furthermore, I do not own the idea for this fanfic. That belongs to Camilla Sandman (AKA: Miss Cam), the writer of the Official Fanfiction University of Middle Earth. She also owns Mini Balrogs. The owner of Mini Aragogs is Meir Brin (writer of the Hogwarts Fanfiction Academy). The owner of the Mini Duel Monsters is Seiyaryu (writer of the Official Fanfiction University of Yugioh). The Mini Heartless are property of Aelyin (writer of Official Fanfiction University of Kingdom Hearts). The Mini Luggages belong to Huinesoron and Raven (writers of the Official Fanfiction University of Discworld). The Mini Youma belong to Lady Lunas (writer of the Official Fanfiction University of Sailor Moon). Any Minis that do not have an OFU, I have created (i.e. the Mini Sentinels for the Matrix). If an OFU is written for these fandoms, I shall fix the problem. More disclaimers will appear throughout this fanfiction.

Author's notes: I am going to try to make this as different as possible from the other OFUs. It does get difficult with the number of OFUs that there are, but I am trying. Oh, and if anyone wants to be a student, the form is in my journal (http : journals . aol . com / autumn19707 / xnemesis). Just remove the spaces in the URL. Copy and paste the form into an email or a comment.

Many Minis and Fighting Fangirls

* * *

Carrie moaned in pain as she woke up. "Why aren't I dead? I should be dead. I'm not Celothiwen, so I can't just fall from great heights and live, can I? Or maybe I really am Celothiwen! That would be so awesome! Then I really could marry my Leggie!!!" she wondered aloud.

"Actually, I highly doubt that 'your Leggie' would ever marry you. No self respecting multiverse character would, but then again, I don't know this 'Leggie' you speak of," a voice answered her thoughts from behind. Carrie flipped around, and stared at the being behind her. This person was _odd_. He had a cartoonish quality to him, and he wore strange clothes.

"Who's the weirdo?" she muttered in disgust.

"Hey! Don't you insult Tuxedo Mask, you...you whore!" an enraged girl screamed from her bed (that she happened to be tied down to). Tuxedo Kamen sighed and walked away.

"Calm down already!" she replied coolly, "I was just making a point."

"You were insulting my Tuxy-poo!!!"

"Um...you're weird!"

"No I'm not! You're a bitch!"

"What's your name anyway, you fah-reak?"

"It's Emilei."

"Well, that's a like stupid fake name!"

"Nuh uh! You little..."

The fight between the two fangirls echoed through the halls of the infirmary, where many of the fangirl kind were just waking up. They all blinked in confusion, and voiced their unanswered questions. Only a few had even an inkling of what was happening.

* * *

Just outside the doorway, however, several confused multiverse characters were trying to figure out just what a 'fah-reak' was. They all decided that they'd rather not know, and left the corridor in search of a few more moments of peace.

"What sort of language is 'fah-reak' a part of anyway?" a catlike man wondered.

"Who knows?" a black haired girl replied. "It doesn't matter anyway. We can understand any language they speak at this point. It's a good thing those wizards managed that."

* * *

"Will you please quiet down? This is a hospital," a tall balding man asked the two fighting fangirls. Carrie looked incredulously at him. She wanted to comment, but decided against it, for fear of insulting a fellow fangirl once more.

The man walked away, and touched a small metal triangle on his shirt. "Captain, they are ready," was all he said.

"Thank you, Doctor," a voice answered.

* * *

Carrie, Emilei, and their fellow students followed the squid like machine that had beckoned for them to follow. They could see several other groups of girls, much like themselves, following other miniature demons.

"Oooooh! Look!" one of the girls in their group exclaimed, "It's a Heartless!"

A fangirl from the Mini Heartless' group scowled, and said, "Well, you have a Sentinel, although it's a bit small."

"What is that?!" a girl following what appeared to be a large spider exclaimed. She was pointing at a small box with legs that a nearby group was following. A girl turned to her, and shrugged. "We're not sure..."

The chattering (and arguing) fangirls entered a large lecture theater, and sat down. They continued talking amongst themselves until the Minis became fed up with them, and silenced the fangirls.

"Now that you fanwriters have finally shut up, I welcome you to OFUC where you will learn the definition of an acceptable crossover. I am Autumn, the course coordinator of this school. You will be taught by them," she gestured to the assorted characters of the different fandoms, "and many others.

"There are three rules you will have to follow. Break them, and the Minis and Skloosh go after you. They are no glomping, no writing fanfiction, and no creating Mary Sues. If you see a Mary Sue, report it to the nearest staff member.

"Your timetables are in your dormitories, along with your belongings. Classes start tomorrow. Don't be late. Now go."

The fanwriters filed out of the hall, and began the tiresome search for their dormitories. From the shadows, two small people watched the fanwriters.

"I wonder why this is so difficult for them. Their names are written on the little pieces of paper on the doors," the shorter of the two wondered.

"Perhaps they are illiterate, Yugi-kun."

"That could be. We already know they can't write, Ryou-kun."

Carrie found her dormitory after an hour of searching, and another hour of being chased by a small demonic-looking monster. Another girl, who was perhaps a few years younger than her, was already there. Carrie looked at her disdainfully. "Who are you? This is my dormitory!"

"I am Nallasariel the Weeper, and your room mate," she replied without looking up.

"We have room mates?! This is like so not fair!" she whined.

"You would have a room mate if this were a normal boarding school or college."

"A point, but you have to agree, it's not fair."

"I don't have to agree."

"So, um...who's your lust object?"

"I don't have one."

"What?! You like have to have a lust object!!"

"Why? Who do you lust after anyway?"

"Legolas Greenleaf of Lord of the Rings! He's just so hott!!"

"Oh, well you have competition then. A lot of people lust after him. And it's Thranduilion, not Greenleaf."

"Who cares?"

"Just go to sleep."

* * *

I live on reviews.


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